Thursday, June 23, 2011

Depth and Hope

“What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, and later you can use it in some story.”
- The Wild Girls by Pat Murphy (Thanks, Brooke!)

Dear Blogging Community,

Today, I spent a couple of hours e-mailing everyone who left a comment on my last post. If your e-mail isn’t hooked up to your blogger account, I couldn’t send one to you. Sorry!
Your comments made me teary and boosted me. More than you know. Thank you.
While my blog shares a bit about my life and me, I try to maintain some privacy. Verbally, it’s hard for me to share when things are hard. So I don’t call family and friends to cry and complain.

But I feel things deeply.

I was worried if I didn’t write about my situation, I’d sink into a deep, dark depression.
When I left my assistant job to become a sub, I despaired for four months.

I don’t have the time or the luxury to feel sorry for myself.
But I can use this low point to propel myself.

School ended today.
I need this summer to investigate each and every job I can find that makes sense for me, even if it’s not teaching-related. In addition, I’ll look into obtaining another teaching certification like Special Ed, which may make me more marketable. (And expensive.)
I also need this summer to finish edits on Naked Eye and query. While I wrote it, I had a reader check every three chapters make suggestions (Thanks, Aubrie). Since I’ve finished, I’ve had one reader look through it and make big-picture comments (Thanks, Judy ). And I have another who is line editing (Thanks, Len ).
After the edits are done, I’ll find another reader. Then I’ll query.

On 06/27 (Monday), I’m doing an interview about blogging. Emily Rittel-King interviewed me about what makes a good blogger and popular blog. While I may not have the most popular blog, I think I’ve learned much about blogging relationships.

The act of blogging is selfish. Flock to ME. Look at my BLOG. I WRITE. My words are GOLDEN.
But it’s more than that. We: provide support in the down times, give advice, seek advice, critique, request critiques, promote books, ask to be promoted. Disasters happen, so we band together.

Teaching is hard. Writing is hard. Parenting is hard. Life is hard.

I celebrate your successes.
I feel your failures.
I shake my fist at the drafter of your rejections.
I hope for you.
I plan to be there for you in the future.
Thank you for being there for me.

Love, Theresa xo



P.S. On a different (and funner) note, Brooke R. Busse won a copy of Possession by Elana Johnson. YaY! Visit this young and talented writer’s BLOG .


43 comments:

  1. I enjoy reading your posts, and I understand the need to vent every once in a while. So glad we have such a supportive and caring network. I hope this summer turns out to be wonderful for you.

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  2. I'm glad things are starting to look brighter for you. It was cool to see so many people leaving you comments of sympathy, encouragement and support. What an awesome community!
    Getting certified in Special Ed sounds like a great plan. ☺ Being more expensive is a lovely plus.

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  3. Bloggers are there for you in the good and the bad times, and sometimes letting people in is exactly what you need to make you feel better. I'm glad you trusted yourself (and us) enough to share how you're really feeling!

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  4. you do a great job!
    at teaching
    at writing
    at parenting
    at life

    and at being a good blog friend!
    thank YOU!

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  5. Theresa, you will succeed, time will resolve it all for you.
    Enjoy your holidays and good luck with your edits.

    -I shake my fist at the drafter of your rejections-
    I love that and feel the same.

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  6. Sounds like the next few months are going to be intrapersonally eventful for you, Theresa! I know you're going to make the absolute most of it, and I look forward to reading about it! And I, too, loved "I shake my fist at the drafter of your rejections." Bless you for that.

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  7. Good luck to you, Theresa!!!
    Thanks for the encouraging words and I hope for the best for you!

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  8. Awww lovely Theresa Milstein!!! You pick yourself up, you dust yourself down, you start all over again!! But this time with ATTITUDE! Yay!! And lots of positive energy!!! Be invigorated!!! You're a star!! Take care
    x

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  9. I love that you shake your fist at drafters of other people's rejections! I read your previous post (and, the one before that too) and can I say I feel very much invested in your future? And I think that's because you love those kids so much. And because you are willing to shake your fist for us, too. So keep us all updated as any news comes in.

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  10. Happy summer vacation.

    When you feel things deeply, it is hard to talk about it and let people in. I'm glad you were able to do so.

    I hope you find what you're looking for, and I hope it's even more fabulous than you expected.

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  11. Theresa, I'm glad you are feeling better. You know we are all here for you. Remember, I'm only an email and a phone call away. Hugs.

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  12. Keep your chin up! You will find something great. Perhaps something that you never imagined.
    Take care and Smile!!

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  13. Sounds like you have a plan. That always helps. I finally set myself some goals in my writing this year because life is so busy and I'm not productive enough writing wise. And it has helped. Hope it helps you.

    And yes, we must support each other through our happy and hard times. We all have both.

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  14. @ Miranda, thank you. I'm glad we have a supportive and caring network too. Especially when it come to writing, writers understand the ups and down better than most other people.

    @ Amanda, the outpouring of support was amazing. It is an awesome community! I'm so glad to be a part of it.

    Being more expensive is only good if someone is willing to pay. And it's going to cost me first!

    @ Talli, I'm glad I shared too. I cringed at writing a maudlin post. The other night, I went to a writer get-together. As I handed out my card, I said, "Don't read the last post. Go back a post or two."

    @ Tara, thank you. You're too sweet!

    @ Brigid, I'm glad you're so confident on my behalf. That's how I feel when I read your pieces. And that's why I shake my fist at your rejections.

    @ Sarah, my plan for this summer is to get in (at least) 2 hours of writing in per day and an hour a few days a week job searching and hunting.

    Those of us who have received rejection know that it's lousy.

    @ Kelly, thanks. I appreciate it. I wish the best for you too.

    @ Old Kitty, once I vented, my head cleared a bit, and I could make a plan. If I keep being scared to make a change, I'll never make it, will I?

    I'll try to keep up the attitude!

    @ Margo, when I'm teaching, I'm attached to the children. When I blog and write, I'm attached to the writers. I'm lucky that I love doing these jobs. That's why I really hope I can get a full-time position. I'd hate to do something I don't love.

    Thanks for reading the last few posts.

    @ Liz, happy summer vacation to you too!

    The worse I feel, the less I can talk about it. It's nice to know you get it.

    @ Len, thank you. It's great to know I can call or e-mail. I bought you 2 postcards in Boston yesterday!

    @ Choices, I like the idea of something great I never imagined coming up. That's why I try not to fantasize about success too much - I might screw up the surprise!

    @ Natalie, I agree that having a plans helps. It makes us more accountable. Keeps us on track.

    It's nice to be here for one another for the ups and downs. You're right, we all have both.

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  15. I second everything that Tara wrote!!!!!!!

    I'm so glad that you're starting to feel better and it's great that you're armed with a plan - that always helps me when I feel unmoored. Thank you for sharing this with all of us! xo

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  16. We are a loyal bunch, hang in there and know we are here. Just in case you change your mind, I left my gun loaded. :)
    Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow

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  17. Theresa, I'm so sorry for what you're going through, and I hope you find the answers you seek this summer.

    Hang in there! You've proven already that you can make it as a writer. Just keep writing!

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  18. Good luck with your goals for the summer, Theresa.
    Can't wait to see your story, won't you share a snip :-)

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  19. Hoping this is a wonderful summer for you! What you said about blogging is SO FUNNY because it's TRUE! LOL.

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  20. Yay Brooke! You'll love it!!! :)

    The blogging community of writers is amazing! I hope you find what works best for you and your family. Good luck with it all!

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  21. -big smiles- I've had this happy feeling a lot today. It's like the sun is shining in my stomach.

    You're thinking more positive today. ^^ Maybe you could try certification for English, I think you mentioned liking it in some of our posts (anything but Math right?).

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  22. I had to go back and read your previous post to catch-up Theresa and I am sorry to hear about your situation.

    I tried for years to get my foot in the door teaching at our local university, and finally gave up--content following another path. Two years later, the called me and I was able to fill-in at the last minute and meet a need they had. I interview next week for a F/T 12 month position that I have a good chance at getting, but then I'll likely be back to the person on the outside looking in.

    Strange how things work out, but anyway you and your family are in my prayers.

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  23. There are definately twinkling stars above, Theresa. I'm a little late to this and your previous post (family travel stuff) but your raw pain was palpable throught the blog.

    Your blogging friends are supporting you with encouragement and love and I'm sure the universe has heard your prayers and has something new sorted right now.

    Big hug x

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  24. Hi Theresa .. I did get the email - many thanks .. and I too felt and feel your pain.

    My thoughts are with you .. and I love your positive attitude to life, despite the downs ... I am certain all will be well & you're not losing site of adding to your knowledge base.

    Have a lovely weekend .. cheers Hilary

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  25. Hi Theresa. I just read your last post and this one and I'm so sorry you're going through this. Your positive attitude is a testimony to what a great person you are, and I'm sure you know by now that you have the support of a large number of people, myself included, in the blogging community (as well as normal people).

    Good luck with your job search over the Summer and with your queries when you get to them. You will get what you want, but sometimes it takes longer to get than we want.

    Your positive outlook will attract a positive outcome.

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  26. That's really what the writing community blogosphere is about for me. Yeah, blogging is innately selfish, but really, blogging in this community is just being a part of it. People you've never met before on the internet can understand what you're going through better than your best friend, when it comes to some things. It's all about supporting others, and letting them support you in return when you need it.

    <3

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  27. Way to go Brooke. And I support you Theresa! You are an inspiration and I hope your summer has bright prospects.

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  28. Like I said, girlfriend, you have heart! You will succeed. I can't wait to buy your books one day soon. I'll say, "I knew her when. Uh-huh." Support woman! We'll all need yours one day and you'll always be there for all of us. <3 (((Hugs)))

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  29. Just catchign up now *grabs you tight and hugs you HARD* I hope you know how very special and awesome you are. VERY! xoxoxo

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  30. Hi Theresa,
    I read your previous post, and my heart goes out to you. I hope that you find just what you're looking for at the right time, soon, to lift you from this awful low point in your life. You're not alone. You have so much going for you. I look forward to following your journey and celebrating the good times with you.

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  31. Haven't been here for a bit, so I'm not sure what's happening. Sounds like you're rallying though.

    Dang! I didn't win, but congrats to Brooke.

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  32. I'm so sorry you've been going through such hard times. I can sense you dedication, your love, your committment to you job. I think it's a crime that you aren't in the position that you should be. You worth so much more than what you're receiving.
    Hugs.

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  33. Sorry I missed commenting on your last post, but I just went back and read it. SO frustrating! Life is hard. It just is. I hate to see my friends go through hard times, but I'll be cheering on your summer. I hope you find a job that is better than you imagined. And I hope you finish that book soon and find an agent very quickly!

    Blogs are selfish, I suppose, but the bloggers I've met sure are unselfish! Hope you enjoy your weekend despite the bad. :)

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  34. I'm glad that our comments were able to give you some support. That's what friends are for.

    Jai

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  35. The blog is a great way to express yourself to the world and you have done just that this past week. Change is good and new doors will open up for you. I'm sending big thoughts your way right now!

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  36. Hi Theresa,

    I so agree with all the above comments. We're here, and I also am glad that you trusted us enough to vent. I always enjoy your posts and think of you as inspirational to all your students.

    There must be so many of your students wanting to be like you. And it is the biggest compliment ever!

    I'm glad that things are turning for the better now.

    All the best!

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  37. I think that's why I write too -- sometimes we have to get it all out. Writing requires a certain amount of bravery because it comes from deep inside ourselves -- whether it's a made up story, or a life experience.

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  38. I read your post and was saddened by your plight. My sister in law now tutors privately and is far better off financially. She said she misses the large school but not the pressure or uncertainty. Maybe private is your answer. Whatever happens I wish you well.

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  39. @ Kathleen, yes, plans are good. Now I just have to follow through with them.

    @ Jules, you do seem like a loyal bunch. And thanks, but I don't think it will come to that!

    @ Vicki, thank you. I plan to edit today, which will get me one step closer to querying.

    @ Deniz, thank you. I'm editing now, so hopefully my beginning will be ready to post on my 2nd blog soon. I posted and new and improved query on there last week.

    @ KarenG, thanks. If we didn't think we had something important to say, we wouldn't have a blog, right?

    @ Jemi, the blogging community is amazing. This week I'll start researching jobs.

    @ Brooke, I hope you enjoy the book. It's on its way!

    I'd love to become certified in English, but that may be the one job that's more competitive than Social Studies. Still, it's not off the table.

    Yes, ANYTHING but Math!

    @ Slamdunk, thank you. I wish you luck with the job. Please keep me posted.

    @ Margo, thanks for the nice comment. I hope to work through it, and be more positive - especially on my blog posts.

    @ Hilary, thank you. I definitely feel more positive now.

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  40. @ Tony, thanks for your support. Between job searching, editing, and querying, I'm going to be busy this summer!

    @ Meagan, I agree. The decision to blog is kind of a selfish act, but we can do with it can be selfless.

    @ Michael, thank you. I hope so too!

    @ Robyn, thank for your support. And your blind faith about my future fame. ; )

    @ Christina, thanks for the hugs and nice words!

    @ LynNerd, I hope to figure something out and have good news soon. I swear, most of my blogs aren't this down.

    @ J.L. Campbell, I'm happy for Brooke too.

    @ Lydia K, thank you. I've decided to stop bemoaning my situation and give myself the means to change it.

    @ Janet, thanks. This summer will be turnaround time for me... I hope. And I'm with you on the supportive bloggers out there!

    @ Jai, it is nice to reach out and have my blogging friends' support. I hope not to have to do this for a long time.

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  41. @ Stephen, yes, a blog is a good way to express myself. Now I hope to express myself in a more positive way.

    @ Nas, thank you. I hope I've inspired the students I've taught, and get to inspire many more in the future.

    @ Lynda, I agree. Sometimes it's hard to write and share, but I always feel better afterwards.

    @ Glynis, I'd love to tutor but few are looking for Social Studies tutors. That said, I'm keeping my eye for any and all opportunities!

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  42. Theresa, everything is hard, but that makes the joys much sweeter. You are a sweetie, and I'm so glad I got to meet you. You are passionate and will achieve success...just hang in there!

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  43. I love the idea of you shaking your fist at my rejections. Thank you! (And I at yours.)

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